Paolo Coehlo Comments on Liverpool, Etc.

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Paolo Coehlo is Brazilian, but has not published any books on soccer. Rather, he is well known for the internationally acclaimed novel “The Alquimist”, which I highly recommend. He draws a clear line between religion and spirituality, and his interviews are a trip. These would be his thoughts on Liverpool this season. Keep in mind he has been committed to an aslyum no less than 3 times.

Q: Liverpool have endured a rough start to their season, losing to Spurs and Aston Villa. What is wrong at Anfield?

A: In between the light and Liverpool, there are many obstacles. However, all obstacles are omens that the Breathing Soul puts in our path to overcome on our quest to win the Premiership. Nothing is wrong at Anfield and everything is wrong at Anfield. The obstacles do not exist but must be overcome. The greater the obstacle, the closer you are to achieving your personal legend.

Q: Many Scouser fans are upset at the lack of financial support by the American owners. Have they lost interest or are we seeing the effects of the credit crunch?

A: Everything we see, everything in front of us is just a part of the visible reality. What the fans see and the owners see is the surface of a great lake, where the undercurrents push us towards a path if we follow our heart. We must listen to our heart, and only then will we be ready to achieve our personal legend.

Q: Glenn Johnson has been an absolute stud at rightback – could you see a defender actually reach the 10 goal mark this season? Is 15 assists out of the question?

A: I see death as a beautiful woman that is sitting across a cafe table from me, with bright red lipstick and a short black skirt. I glance into her gaze and am pulled in, yet I resist because resistance is the key to tolerance and the opposite of obedience. The ones you love will love you and should never be obstacles to your personal legend. If they truly love you, they will allow you to follow this legend.

Q: Fernando Torres is an absolute must-start when healthy, but fitness concerns seem to arise each spring. Does Benitez ride the young Spaniard too much? Or does he have to?

A: I believe that everything is one thing only. Nevertheless, there are some questions to which I do not know the answer. I would not say that I have stopped questioning, but that there is not an answer for everything. The important thing is to find good questions, not good answers.

Q: Scousers are fed up with the two Dutch strikers- the ugly yet effective Kuyt and the flashy but fizzling Babel. Should they both be shipped out come winter?

A: It is dangerous anytime one person or organization says that they have ¨the one, ultimate truth.¨ I believe in discipline, organization, collective worship, and humbleness towards the mysteries. Yet I cannot accept an entity or philosophy which is premised on such an absurd monopoly. To die alive is to take a risk and pay the price.

Q: Bottom line, will Liverpool win the EPL this season? Or will Stevie G at least lead midfielders in goals?

A: Omens are the particular tongue by which God speaks to you. My omens are my omens. Your omens are your omens. I will die while I am alive, yet I will not live to die. There will always be beginner´s luck, and at the end, there will be a test of character and skills and lessons learned. When you are so close to obtaining your personal legend, the world will make you pay. But if you have faith, and learn to read the omens, you will achieve your personal legend or at least die trying.

Note: this is an unauthorized, obvious satire. For legitimate stuff, go ro Mr. Coehlo´s website or the interfaith website which conducted the real interview.

3 thoughts on “Paolo Coehlo Comments on Liverpool, Etc.

  1. Pingback: Not So Much A Hiatus As A Yawning Chasm. « Studs Up

  2. Paolo Coelho is my favourite author in the WTF theory genre of books.

    If I wanted to be Bill Gates, I’m sure the universe would conspire to provide me with a path.

    All I’ll need to do then is to tread that path. But wait, I don’t need to tread that path either. I just need to want to tread that path. The universe will conspire to get me to tread.