The Number One Reason Why MLS Should Expand to Topeka, KS

So, MLS is expanding all over the place. Sometimes, they occupy and share an NFL stadium. Other times, expansion cities scurry to build lovely soccer-specific stadiums. In their haste, though, they sometimes, ahem, have to clear out still-in-use churches. In Orlando City, the municipality balked at a local church’s initial asking price (tens of millions) and jumped straight to eminent-domain and litigation. Now, in Atlanta, rumors swirl that a stadium proposal will lead to the demolition of the City’s first black Baptist Church (and super-gentrification of the neighborhood Martin Luther King Jr. called home).

As someone who went to college in A-town (The term “ATL” is sooooooo 2004), I can understand why Arthur Blank wants to leave the aging (built in 1992) Georgia Dome, all tucked away down there (a mere 3-5 miles from downtown Atlanta). But, in all seriousness, if MLS teams are going to be destroying churches to build homes, I have a sweet idea for a location. Continue reading “The Number One Reason Why MLS Should Expand to Topeka, KS” »

SPONSORED: Top 7 Qatar Hotels for the ’22 World Cup (By Migrant Body Count)

We are the Qatar Tourism Authority are aware of the recent issues that have come to light about our country. We are aware that many fans of soccer are very sad and mad and angry. We respect the emotions of the fans. We promise to improve these things as much as possible.

In that respectful regards, we have decided to create a useful list of hotels where fans can stay that addresses the fans’ big concerns. First, many of you are worried that the hotels in Qatar will be beyond your modest budgets. Second, many of you would feel guilty staying in a hotel that was built by many migrant laborers who died. Here are the hotels as rated for you cost-conscious consumers with a conscience.

Good luck finding the most affordable reservation with the lowest death count. Continue reading “SPONSORED: Top 7 Qatar Hotels for the ’22 World Cup (By Migrant Body Count)” »

Top 10 Reasons David Moyes Will Be United’s Greatest Ever Manager

David Moyes. Surprisingly, he is not loved by all. After a narrow 3-0 loss to Manchester City on the back of a nail-biting defeat by Liverpool, some fans have dared to question his authority and acumen. In fact, the Telegraph listed 31 reasons he had to go.

Luckily, we have ten cold-hard facts as to why Moyes will soon lead United to greatness. Continue reading “Top 10 Reasons David Moyes Will Be United’s Greatest Ever Manager” »

Top Ten Tom Clancy and Robert Ludlum Novel Titles that Describe the Outline of James Milner’s Member

Tom Clancy. Robert Ludlum. The master wordsmiths. The Shakespeares of our day. The literary giants. Yet, while reading one of their deeply profound treatises on the human condition, I noticed something odd: the titles eerily resemble if not mirror the outline of James Milner’s member while wearing white shorts. Granted, the works of these artists can be ascribed to all of humanity, ergo they can describe the state of Milner’s trouser snake.

Yet, seriously, some titles just go too well with a certain someone’s pocket sausage. Continue reading “Top Ten Tom Clancy and Robert Ludlum Novel Titles that Describe the Outline of James Milner’s Member” »

The 8 Reasons Why Real Madrid REALLY Lost the Most Recent Clasico

Cristiano knows of many reasons for the absolute thievery in the latest Clasico and is not afraid of telling the world. Nothing will stop him naming and shaming these parties and/or organisations who will do him (oh and his team) wrong. For it must be told.

And here is a list of said culpable parties, as named by CRon to Webbie of the lovey Football and Music. Continue reading “The 8 Reasons Why Real Madrid REALLY Lost the Most Recent Clasico” »

Top 11 Things Arsene Wenger Is an Expert At In Addition to Failure

After the recent 6-0 loss to Chelsea, Arsenal fans feel even more stung by Mou’s earlier claims that Wenger was a “specialist at failure.” Luckily, Gunners fun and excellent blogger Miriti Murungi, of the soon to be reborn Nutmeg Radio, has provided a listicle of non-failure areas where Wenger also specializes and excels.

They are numerous, so cheer up! Continue reading “Top 11 Things Arsene Wenger Is an Expert At In Addition to Failure” »

The FutFeed Manifesto: Because Viral Content is Contagious

I know, I know. This website has gone through so many “reboots” it might as well be a movie featuring a comic book character as protagonist. The Puffington Host. FutSail Online University. We’ve tried a million-and-one-ways to squeeze a dime from internet content. And we’ve failed. Up until today. Continue reading “The FutFeed Manifesto: Because Viral Content is Contagious” »

Top Ten Mysterious Illnesses that Afflict American Fans During Champions League Fixtures

International fandom is often looked down upon, not surprisingly. For centuries, we’ve clung to the nation-states based on geography as the cornerstone of individual and collective identity. We were born in X place. We are citizens of X place. We belong to, and praise, X place. For the last century, sports followed society and ergo fans followed teams based on geography.

Enter the 21st century. Technology, such as cable TV and the internet, has allowed individuals to follow and love clubs regardless of geographic location. Soccer has grown in the US thanks to a solid domestic league but also the exposure of the top European teams. Yet, there’s still a problem: the top games, Champions League fixtures, are played on Tuesday and Wednesday afternoons at about 2:00 central time in the US. They are played on work-days. Even worse, the timing means a fan can’t take a super long lunch.

Oddly, and purely coincidentally, these fixtures have started to coincide with a unique strain of illnesses causing fans to miss work on said dates and at said times. Here’s a helpful list of these emerging illnesses: Continue reading “Top Ten Mysterious Illnesses that Afflict American Fans During Champions League Fixtures” »

Ask An American Soccer Fan: Pending Ukraine Friendly

The US men’s national team currently has a friendly scheduled vs. the Ukraine. (No article: here’s why) As a team that narrowly lost to France in a two-legged playoff, it promised to be a stern test for the team. However, the recent violence in political developments have raised the specter that the game may be moved and/or even called off. Despite a recent peace deal signed last Friday, nobody knows if the other side will respect it. The President has left the country and the PM has been released, but will the loyalists put down their arms?

We decided to ask a sample of US soccer fans what they thought about the game and this highly volatile situation. Continue reading “Ask An American Soccer Fan: Pending Ukraine Friendly” »