Real Madrid have launched an ASTOUNDING bid to sign Manchester United’s superstar player Nani. This is not a true fact, but this is a transfer rumor so it doesn’t have to be. You have read it and will come back for more regardless of how quickly it is denied by all parties involved. You are helpless to the siren song of the unsubstantiated internet transfer rumor. You can’t get enough of them. Here is another one that I am telling you right now was just made up by me as I type this: AC Milan to acquire Pepe Reina from Liverpool. You know it’s not true, yet your mind still considers it as if it could be. You are weak. Transfer rumors and the banner ads that surround them have total control over your entire sense of being. Thank you for making it so easy. Also: the New York Red Bulls will sign Lionel Messi from Barcelona this summer.

Brooks’ blog has tastefully displayed box ads. Good try, but no cigar.